Online dating website reviews: Staying safe while online dating
If your online date is trustworthy and sincerely interested in you, they'll want you to feel safe and be happy. Here are some common sense rules for when you meet on or offline.
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The dos and don'ts of staying safe while online dating
Choose a reputable online dating site
Choose a well-run, reputable online dating service to ensure your online dating adventure gets off to a secure start. Check the website’s policies against inappropriate behaviour and measures in place to keep your identity secret.
Stay anonymous while online dating
Use an anonymous email address as a further safety measure. As well as your dating site’s webmail system, you may also like to set up a third-party email address to receive any alerts or emails from your chosen dating site.
Protect your PC privacy while online dating
Disable cookies or automatic log in on your computer if you share it with other users or family members. At the very least it'll save you the embarrassment of others accessing your dating activity, and will also protect your personal data from fraudsters.
Read our internet safety guide for more PC security tips.
Choose a suitable online dating user name
Be mindful of the implications of your username. For example, up4anything666 may sound fun and diverting at first, but could equally get you noticed by the wrong type of admirers. Also avoid including your real name or location in your username.
Don't give too much away while online dating
It’s not just contact details that are valuable to fraudsters or shady characters. To stay as anonymous as you can during preliminary conversations, you shouldn't disclose details such as your employer, surname, children’s names, location or date of birth.
Keep your personal details safe
Don't reveal contact details in your online profile or during conversations with other users. Most reputable dating agencies incorporate ‘double blind’ web mail accounts enabling you to email other users without revealing your own email address.
Take action on badly behaved online dating site members
Don't put up with bad behaviour. Block any member who makes you feel uncomfortable. Most sites enable you to stop receiving messages from any other member. If their behaviour is abusive or inappropriate, consider forwarding any evidence you have to the site’s moderators. For example, Match.com lists abuses they want to hear about as any of the following:
- Married people or children using the service
- Members sending harassing or offensive emails
- Members behaving inappropriately after meeting in person
- Criminals or other ‘shady’ characters using the service
- Fraudulent registration or profiles
- Spam or solicitation (messages trying to sell you something)
- Copyright infringement
- Members asking you for money or donations
- Any other violation of the site’s policies
Off line dating tips and advice
What to do when meeting an online dating contact
On a first date meet up in a public place
Do…meet up in a public place – the more public the better. Tell someone where you are going and when you will be back.
Do…stay sober. Drinking too much can desensitise you to potentially hazardous situations, leave you open to giving away too much personal information and may prevent you from making a good decision about your compatibility with your date.
Do…let your date know that your meeting is not a secret. If possible arrange for a friend or family member to call you halfway through the date to give you a plausible excuse to leave if necessary.
Do…pre-prepare an excuse for what you are doing after your date. This will help if you want to leave the meeting early or prevent you feeling obliged to stay with someone you have not hit it off with.
What not do when meeting an online dating contact
Don’t…agree to be picked up at home or offer your date a lift. Keep your home address to yourself until you get to know one another better.
Don’t…forget to take a mobile phone so you can call a friend or a taxi if you begin to feel uneasy.
Don’t…leave your drink or personal possessions unattended – your drink could be drugged or your personal information stolen. If you must leave your drink unattended to go to the loo, order another when you return.
Don’t…let your date walk you to your car if you’re unsure about them. Try to park in a public place and if in doubt, hail a taxi or take public transport and collect your car later.
Don’t…agree to meet up with your date’s friends or associates. Be wary if your date suddenly wants to change the plans for your meeting while you are out. If you’re unsure, suggest re-scheduling for another time.